Thursday, July 19, 2007

Down with German Accountants!

Here's my week so far:


Church was air conditioned. Otherwise I just laid around whining about the heat.


So Monday morning I got to work and unlocked the doors as I always do (I arrive 10 minutes before the pool opens, so it works out). It was an aquafit morning and there were three new ladies waiting to get in. Eagerly waiting. Angrily eagerly waiting. The one lady yelled at me about how they only had 2 minutes to get changed and I thought "gee I hope I'm not that late!". But when I got in I realized that it was only ten to and politely mentioned that perhaps her watch was wrong? She didn't think so.

When I went to let the patrons out onto the pool deck I found that the "No admittance, Pool unsupervised" chain that blocks the door was removed and the ladies had admitted themselves to the unsupervised pool. This makes me aaaangry, by the way. The other ladies said "we told them!" And then one of them (a pleasant mid-sixties lady) muttered "b****es like that don't need to come here" Oh, so the change room was fun too! The men stayed in their change room, because the chain was there! See my regulars are better trained.

Then the vocal lady yelled about where was the instructor (in the pool!) was she going to do anything (oh please Katy, do something!). It was good fun, especially as I was still a bit loopy from sleeping pills and couldn't formulate an adequate reply. She was wearing a bikini and goggles. An odd combination, and neither are really aquafit wear. So long story shorter she (and her two friends) grumbled and complained and made super good friends with Katy and the regulars.

Then while doing a series of tuck jumps her entire nipple popped out of the top of her suit.

I thought "I could tell her, but she'll just yell at me again!"

Katy thought "I could tell her, but she's mean!"

The regulars thought "ha! b**ch shouldn't wear a bikini to aquafit!"

And so she remaind doing tuck jumps with her nipple hanging out for a good five minutes until she noticed on her own (her friends were at the other end of the pool).

This story has two morals:
1) be nice, you never know when you will need a friend.
2) Wear a sport suit when doing aquafit.

Tuesday I had a conversation with a swimming lesson mom that went like this:
me: So how are lessons going?
slm: Well I have a concern about my son's instructor.
me: oh?
slm: We were driving home last night and I asked him how his lesson was and he said "Mommy my teacher swears all the time"
me: awesome

So I guess there was a whole lot of "Oh My God!"'s thrown around by said teacher and they are a nice Christian family so it was quite upsetting to the little boy. Good times. So I got to write said instructor a letter about professional and child friendly language. Good times.

Geeze, that's only Tuesday, I'll fill you in on the rest tomorrow.